I wanna see you be brave

I think that hands down this is the single best email I have ever received from a teacher in my 4 years here at CSC!
Like, no really. I mean my whole senior project rough draft was due yesterday and before today I had been up for almost 29 hours straight. I mean I don’t count small naps of like 5-10 minutes actually sleeping thank you very much. I mean i was actually shaking yesterday as i was reviewing my materials and I had a panic attack when I gave it over to my capstone adviser.
The project isn’t how I envisioned it turning out but at the end of the day I am proud. I like what I made and I could go in there and defend my decisions of why it went the way that it did and no one will ever be able to take that from me.
My capstone was completed over more than the normal amount of all nighters, through panic attacks and the like but at the end of the day I can say that I made something. I made something that will hopefully help my organization grow their online presence and help them connect even more with the people that they are trying to help, and that matters.
So, sure I still have edits to make and sections to add but the first draft is done and it was accepted and holy shit I am going to graduate.

I think that hands down this is the single best email I have ever received from a teacher in my 4 years here at CSC!

Like, no really. I mean my whole senior project rough draft was due yesterday and before today I had been up for almost 29 hours straight. I mean I don’t count small naps of like 5-10 minutes actually sleeping thank you very much. I mean i was actually shaking yesterday as i was reviewing my materials and I had a panic attack when I gave it over to my capstone adviser.

The project isn’t how I envisioned it turning out but at the end of the day I am proud. I like what I made and I could go in there and defend my decisions of why it went the way that it did and no one will ever be able to take that from me.

My capstone was completed over more than the normal amount of all nighters, through panic attacks and the like but at the end of the day I can say that I made something. I made something that will hopefully help my organization grow their online presence and help them connect even more with the people that they are trying to help, and that matters.

So, sure I still have edits to make and sections to add but the first draft is done and it was accepted and holy shit I am going to graduate.

Holy shit Suits. Like what the fuck. No but seriously what the fuck.

I have been up for like 27+ hours and I really should have expected this but that’s not a great way to end my night. Ugh, off to bury myself in makeup work and I probs. won’t be on a lot this weekend cause my senior project is due next Tuesday.

BUT GUESS WHAT!?!? AFTER THAT I AM BASICALLY FREEEEE!

Ugh, so really just need to hunker down and try and not seriously doubt everything :/

harveyspockter:

thatspectersmile:

SuitsChat is now open!
Streams are available here. Come on in, kick back, and hang out before the episode starts!

New stream masterpost is here! 

harveyspockter:

thatspectersmile:

SuitsChat is now open!

Streams are available here. Come on in, kick back, and hang out before the episode starts!

New stream masterpost is here

I don’t know why I ever thought taking a Marx class while trying to complete my capstone was a good idea. I literally have deadline on top of deadlines on top of deadlines.

But really, it needs to be April 16 already

Design of social media book complete! If only using InDesign was as easy as handrawing designs :) #capstone #mediamajorprobs

Design of social media book complete! If only using InDesign was as easy as handrawing designs :) #capstone #mediamajorprobs

harveyspockter:

thatspectersmile:

SuitsChat is now open!
Streams are available here. Come on in, kick back, and hang out before the episode starts!

New stream masterpost is here! 

harveyspockter:

thatspectersmile:

SuitsChat is now open!

Streams are available here. Come on in, kick back, and hang out before the episode starts!

New stream masterpost is here

If anyone needs me I’ll be curled up with my crime and logic notes #studying #studydate

If anyone needs me I’ll be curled up with my crime and logic notes #studying #studydate

Pre capstone presentation done and of course had to rock my boys jerseys for it! Opening day is like my Christmas :) #openingday #capstone #senioryear #selfie

Pre capstone presentation done and of course had to rock my boys jerseys for it! Opening day is like my Christmas :) #openingday #capstone #senioryear #selfie

It’s always something……..

I think that this .gif accurately describes my mood at the moment. It’s so incredibly frustrating to go from having a decent day to having a shitty day in the span of a few words.

Having a fight with a roommate sucks hardcore and it sucks even more when you know you should stop talking before you say something that digs you into an even bigger hole but you physically cannot stop yourself from saying the words. Because in the moment they feel so goof and so liberating because you finally got it all off your chest and those moments of complete soul bearing conversations are needed because keeping it inside just literally kills you bit by bit. But, at the end of the conversation it still sucks esp. for me because I care about people and I never want to be the source of their pain. As someone who has been on the other side of that pain I have always tried to make sure I never am responsible for that look of abject pain on the face of someone else because I know how deep that pain can cut and go.

But at the same time even after I said it all I can’t muster up the energy to care that I hurt this other person and that may make me the shittiest person ever but its hard to feel bad when my hands are shaking, water is pooling in my eyes, and my heart feels like it is ready to jackrabbit outta its place.

What I have learned from this argument I never wanted in the first place? If I’m gonna cry as much as I am I might as well wear the tear tracks with pride….

Frustrated. Frustrated. Frustrated.

Oh, and let’s add a dash of hurt into that mix

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